Thursday, April 27, 2006

Any day now

Any day now you'll be reading about me in The Gazette. Any day now I'll be arrested for disturbing my neighbour. Any day now while I'm getting arrested maybe I'll ask the cops to arrest my neighbour for disturbing me. I mean, he started it!

For over 2 years now I have been listening to my neighbour scrape his chair across his kitchen tile floor 5 days a week, somewhere betwen 5:30-6:30am, making noise like a bull elephant that shakes my floor, my wall and wakes me up every time. For the first 2 years I simply let it go. Ignored it and tried (in vain) to go back to sleep. In the last 6 months I've been a little more aggressive. I've taken to banging on the wall with my fist. That seemed to work from time to time, but I was starting to have some pain in my hand from all the banging. So now I've moved up to the baseball bat. That worked well at first. He'd scrape his chair, I'd get up and bang the baseball bat on the wall. Instant silence. Next day we'd start all over again. And the next. And the next... Recently though, my neighbour has started to get a little pissed off with all my banging (doesn't he wonder why I'm banging?!?!) so he scrapes his chair continually while I'm banging the bat on the wall. Lucky for me I'm angrier than he is, because I can keep up with the banging longer than he can scrape his chair across the floor.

Round 1 to me.

5 comments:

Why said...

Thanks for a laugh, that is classic!

Angry Gnome said...

That's too bad. I can "take care" of him if you want when I move to your hood.

Stef said...

Cool - we can throw rotten eggs on his door or something ... heh!

Why said...

Have you ever seen this guy?

Stef said...

Once.